Deciding to work with a therapist is one of the best decisions you can make when dealing with a mental health crisis. Whether you’re experiencing grief from a sudden loss, battling an eating disorder, or want to learn how to better engage with your children, a trained therapist can help you process emotions and offer tools for healthy relationships.

But not all therapists have the soft skills necessary to truly help others. They may have a diploma on the wall, but some therapists can do more harm than good.

Here are 5 signs you are dealing with the WRONG therapist and that it’s time to move on:

1. They are Clearly Not Listening

Have you ever caught your therapist checking their phone? Do they often not respond to something you’ve said? Listening, truly listening, is the number one skill a good therapist needs to have.

2. They Tell You What to Do

The role of a therapist is to empower you and offer skills you then take and use outside the office. They are not supposed to order you around and make your decisions for you.

3. They Impose Their Own Beliefs

Your therapist is there to share mental health tools and strategies, not their own political, religious, or social beliefs. And they certainly shouldn’t take time to force their beliefs onto you.

4. They Broke Confidentiality

Therapists are ethically obligated to protect patient privacy. The only exception is when breaking confidentiality is necessary to save someone’s life, as in the case of a possible suicide attempt. 

5. They Encourage You to Blame Others

You want a therapist who will be in your corner and cheer you on down your path of recovery. But you DON’T want a therapist who encourages you to blame everyone else for the issues you face. Therapy should empower the individual to be in control of themselves, their thoughts, emotions, and ultimately life choices.

Conclusion

Therapy can be a beautiful and life-changing experience. So long as you are working with a GOOD therapist.

You can avoid BAD therapists if you get on the phone with each prospective therapist before you schedule that first session and ask some probing questions. Not sure what to ask? Download a copy of my free resource, “Top 10 Questions to ask a therapist” and arm yourself.